Four year old builds regulation skills while parents build confidence

Ella was only four but she was strong willed and knew what she wanted. One day Ella was rolling a tire around the playground and she rolled right into Jackson who was digging in the sand...

Ella wanted Jackson to move but he was content with his spot and said no. Ella began to protest loudly, which got my attention, but Jackson continued to play seemingly unbothered by her escalating voice and body movements.

As I walked over to them I gave verbal ques, "Ella put the tire down. Can you go around?" She was not responding to me, she was not letting go of that tire and she was not taking no for an answer. I approached the children before Ella was able to add more force and separated her from the tier. This sent Ella into a frenzy. She began to cry, scream and thrash her body as she threw dirt and kicked wildly.

A few weeks later Ella's mother, Cindy, was attending a parent workshop and sharing similar stories of Ella's upsets at home with her sister. Cindy felt that Ella’s reactions were bigger than the intensity of the situations and they happened almost daily. She shared that when Ella's emotions were that high she felt ill equipped to help her. Cindy was overwhelmed by Ella’s reactions and they often lead to her reacting in ways she later felt guilty about.

After a few months of workshops and coaching Cindy returned to say that Ella's intense reactions were happening less and that when they did happen she knew exactly what needed to be done to help herself and Ella.